One guarantee of getting older is the experience of loss. Unfortunately, many individuals lose loved ones in their lifetime, whether it’s a sibling or a grandparent. While it can be tricky to process the experience, there is a way to find peace after the death of a loved one.
It’s vital to remember that healing takes time. There is no one-size-fits-all solution to recovery, but there is a way to feel yourself again. Keep reading to learn more about some steps that will help you find peace after losing someone you love.
Let Yourself Grieve Fully
One of the first things you must do is allow yourself to grieve fully. Many individuals try to push through the feelings, ignoring them and trying to press forward. This action isn’t healthy. For your body and mind to recover, it’s valuable to let yourself feel all the feelings when you are in a safe location. You must grieve fully if you want to find peace after a loved one’s death.
A sure thing is that pain and strong emotions will not go away faster if you ignore them. They will return, stronger than ever, and you won’t be able to prepare for them. Actively face the pain. If you want to cure your grief, the only way around it is through it.
It’s normal to feel strong feelings for a long time after losing a loved one. Permit yourself to grieve and don’t feel embarrassed or frustrated with any emotions that might arise.
Related: Dealing With Loss During the Holidays
Stages Might Not Happen
Typically, grief is associated with stages. Typically, individuals are expected to go through denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance before coming out on the other side. While it might seem nice to have checkpoints along the way, it’s helpful to remember no two grieving processes are the same. Yours might not include these stages.
For some, the grief process might feel like being thrown around on a rollercoaster. For others, it could be closer to sitting in the ocean and floating on top of waves. There is no set standard for what it feels like to go through the loss of a loved one. As you move through this season, try not to get caught up in what “should” be happening with your emotions.
Prepare for Flashbacks
There will always be some days that are harder than others when grieving the loss of a loved one. In particular, there will be times when objects, events, people, and more will remind you of them. It’s important to prepare for encountering things that will bring back bittersweet memories of time with them.
You can’t always be prepared for when you will encounter these things. However, days are easier to prepare for ahead of time. It’s an excellent idea to let a friend or family member know about days that are more of a struggle so they can help you through a tough season.
Remember Them
Many are afraid moving on will cause them to forget their loved ones. That doesn’t have to be the case. Moving forward involves growth emotionally, but you don’t have to leave the person behind. You will always carry memories with you as you age, along with the pain of losing the individual.
It can be helpful to find a way to remember the person each year, to do something special you would typically do together. Have a picnic, go to their favorite restaurant, or play a game you used to play together. When you’re ready, honor them in your time and in your way.
Seek Help If Needed
It’s common to try to cut yourself off from others and seek isolation when mourning the loss of a loved one. For some, this can lead to issues like prolonged grief disorder or extreme isolation. These things aren’t ideal, especially if you’re in the throes of the intense emotions that come with grief.
If you are struggling to manage your grief, or suffering from mental health issues, seek help. There are many groups out there, such as SAMHSA, that are ready to provide resources and connect you to those who will help you through this time in your life. Don’t hesitate if you think your grief is growing to a level beyond your control.
Find Friends for Support
One of the best ways to move through the experience of losing a loved one is to lean on your friends for support. Socializing with people you love and joining in with activities can slowly make you feel like yourself again. They will also be there for moments when you feel emotionally vulnerable.
Sometimes, all it takes is someone to sit and listen to how you’re feeling to make you feel better. Try to lean on the connections you have right now and attempt to make new connections, especially amongst those who have been through what you’re going through.
Join a Group
A grief group is an excellent way to deal with the loss of a loved one, whether it’s in-person or online. Many are hesitant to join a group, but it’s an effective way to bond with others who have experienced loss and work through your grief in a healthy manner.
You can look for grief groups through sources like GriefShare, which will point you toward opportunities in the area. You can attend these classes in person or online, though it’s always better to be there in person. Groups provide guidance, tips, comfort, relief, and a unique peace of mind as you grow.
Keep Pressing Forward
The most critical thing you can do when grieving the death of a loved one is to keep moving forward. In the worst of it, celebrate the smallest things like getting out of bed in the morning or making yourself a home-cooked dinner. Every step counts, no matter how small.
Losing a loved one is one of the most difficult things anyone will go through in their life. Consider your emotions, find others to lean on, and continue growing forward as the memory of your loved one remains with you for the rest of your life.
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